Ever wonder why you indulge in the sexual fantasies that you do? I have, and there is a science behind fetishes that you might not know about. There are reasons that we like the things we do, and it isn't as simple and straightforward as one might think.
What is fetish?
First of all, let's define what fetish is precisely. Fetish is the sexual attraction that is linked to something that isn't found in your typical relationship. Many people use the word abnormal when defining fetishes, but that is far from the truth. Fetishes are somewhat common, at least more common than you would know.
For example, the fetish that everyone seems to know about involves feet. This attraction is not something that everyone experiences, making it a fetish! Fetishes generally involve:
- Body parts
- Other people's behavior
- The behavior of oneself
- Things/objects unrelated to the body
Some more examples are dominance and submission, lingerie, and hair. Fetish encompasses various sexual experiences, so knowing what causes them gives insight into how your brain works!
Neurons and Foot Fetishes
Back to foot fetishes, there is an oddly specific reason why it is one of the most well-known body part fetishes. In our brains, our senses are mapped out in a very specific way that helps us function. In this map, we have a spot for genital stimulation and a site for stimulation of the feet. These neuron paths are right next to each other in our brains, making it easy for the senses to overlap. When this happens, the signal for genitals overlaps with the signal for feet. This makes a connection between the two and creates a sexual attraction for both the genitals and the feet!
Sexual Conditioning
Simple associations are another aspect of the realm of fetishes. Repeated exposure to something that also creates a sexual response can result in the formation of a fetish.
Have you heard of Pavlov's dogs? It's just like that! Pavlov was a scientist who wanted to condition a dog to salivate at the sound of a bell. In order to do this, he would ring a bell and then feed the dog. The dog then connects this sound to food and salivates whenever it hears the bell ringing.
The same thing happens with humans, whether we like it or not. Notice how you get hungry around the same time every day? It's because we've conditioned ourselves to eat around 12, resulting in a rumbly stomach around the same time every day.
But let's relate this back to fetishes. Getting turned on while something non-sexual is happening can cause your brain to connect the two things together. This can especially apply when it comes to porn and developing a new attraction to something. Say you watch porn that is different than what you usually watch, and it has something you're not typically attracted to. Getting turned on by the video and seeing that new fetish can cause a connection and lead you to be attracted to it! The same goes for non-sexual things as well. Having sex with a movie playing in the background can be a dangerous game. If your brain associates what you're doing with the movie that is on the television, chances are you'll get turned on the next time you play it. It's the same thing with music. You know that song you really like to play when you're getting intimate with your partner? Now it turns you on when you play it in the car!
Conditioning and fetishes are so standard and could be an explanation for your fun sexual fantasy. The brain works in mysterious ways that even heavily influence our sex life.
Experiences and Fetishes
Early childhood can have quite a significant impact on sexual fetishes, believe it or not. Many fetishes will develop before a person hits puberty, whether or not they are aware of it. Despite this, there are still experiences later in life that can result in the formation of fetishes as well.
In early childhood, something as simple as watching people put stockings on can create a fetish to be discovered later in life. As you develop as a child, little things can be reflected later in life. Your brain is soaking up information and spitting it out in its own way.
This isn't as common as a fetish formed by experiences involving trauma. When a traumatic event happens, you process or repress it. Repressing the trauma means you don't necessarily face or think about what happened to you. Processing means you have some method to get through the pain inflicted upon you through a traumatic event.
Let's use some examples to understand further how trauma forms a fetish. If, in the past, you experienced a traumatic event where you didn't have control over a situation, that might reflect in your sexual escapades. You might take on a more dominant role to control the situation on the one hand. On the other hand, you may take a more submissive approach in the bedroom to replicate how you felt in a safer and more fun environment. Having pain inflicted upon you in a negative way may cause you to want to experience that in a pleasurable way in your sex life. What you are involved in is formed by how your brain decides to process your trauma.
Fulfilling the Fantasy
Now you might be wondering why this is even important. It's so that you can understand yourself and how your body works to improve your sexual experiences! We also have plenty of ways to get your fetish fill.
Here are some things to get the fun started:
- Quickie Cuffs are a safe start to trying out handcuffs due to their beginner-friendly style.
- A pair of nipple clamps are a great choice when exploring fetish as they work for all bodies.
- A simple blindfold can enhance your sexual experience and increase your senses.
- A small flogger is another excellent addition when starting to explore impact play.
- Massage candles are another way to explore the realm of fetish and temperature play, as they burn at a low temperature and can be rubbed into the skin.
Of course, so many more options are available when indulging in your fetishes. If you like something, I guarantee there is something that exists to fulfill your desires.
Conclusion
All people are different, meaning that there are so many other fetishes to explore. Because of how different every person is, there may be a fetish for every adult that exists! The critical thing to remember is that there is nothing abnormal about having a fetish, and it is all about your brain chemistry.
