Open Relationships, Yay or Nay?

Posted by Sonia Williams on

A quote I firmly live by is "to each their own" everyone has preferences, likes, dislikes, wants, needs and yes fetishes! Your telling me you never had an inappropriate thought about your pool boy? Different strokes for different folks.

It is becoming quite apparent that people are diving into the "Open Relationship" lifestyle more often these days. I would not consider myself an expert personally on this topic but here is what I do know.

What is an Open Relationship?

For most people open relationships are described as committed and loving relationships with someone but also being free to pursue and explore sexual fantasies and impulses. A non-monogamy. From the outside looking in, people who are in Open Relationships are "swingers". I know it's a dream come true kind of relationship for some people. I have met quite a few couples who were in an open relationship but some play by different rules than others. I think that when deciding to enter an open relationship its probably best to lay all your stuff out on the table. What are you comfortable with, what are you not comfortable with, will you tell each other of other sexual endeavors, will the acts be done solo or together? Ive been told by men that it is a turn on to watch another man service their woman! Who knew? Maybe your a women who is interested in exploring with other women and your significant other is okay with that. I would not say that there are any firm set rules with this Open Relationship way of life, its more about what works for you. 

So now that we know what an Open Relationship is more or less now we try to answer the tough question.

Who is an Open Relationship good for?

Obviously an Open Relationship is not for everyone, but how do you decide if its something for you? I think that now a days divorce and infidelity are so common that people look for different ways to be more open minded in their relationships. I spoke with one couples that said being in an Open Relationship saved their marriage because it allowed them to be committed to one another but be free to explore themselves. Some couples go into an Open Relationship although they are fulfilled in their relationship with their partners. Monogamy is a term that everyone has heard but not everyone agrees with. Society has always told us that the purpose of dating is to find the person you will spend forever with, but for some people monogamy is not realistic or even human nature. If you find that you are not a serious monogamist maybe an Open Relationship is for you.

When an Open Relationship is not working:

Jealousy can rear its ugly head even with the most understanding and open minded people. Being open to your partner being sexual with someone else takes a lot of trust and communication. Setting rules and boundaries that work best for you and your partner is one of the first conversations you should have so that Jealousy has a less likely chance of making an appearance. Remember you can always come back and modify these rules as time goes on and add or take away whatever is not working for you. 

Maybe an Open Relationship is for you:

If you find yourself having a hard time committing or don't fall into the stereotypical category of being with one person till the end of your days, then maybe a non monogamous relationship is for you. A lot of people believe that like most animals  it is not natural for people to mate for life. Although there are a few animals that do mate for life like Gibbon Apes, Swans, Turtle Doves, Bald Eagles and Wolves it is not very common in the Animal Kingdom either. So maybe there is something to this whole open Relationship way of life, it could be right for you.

Sex toys can add fun to any relationship.

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