Whether it be to make up for the size limitations of either partner that prevent a thoroughly satisfying experience, a dildo is a fantastic tool to keep in the bedside drawer.
It's worth adding that wanting any dildo does not make you a de-facto sex lunatic who needs outside help to satisfy her natural urges. It's entirely healthy to have something for yourself! When you need to practice self-care, your partner does not need to feel intimidated or cast aside in favor of your new sex toy.
Suppose you're worried your partner may object to you having a dildo. In that case, I recommend having an open and honest chat with your partner about how this does not mean they do not satisfy you or that you don't want them anymore. It simply means you want to connect with your sexuality deeper. Once you've decided you'd like to purchase a dildo, the next task is figuring out what exactly you want your toy to accomplish for you. A simple Google search reveals hundreds if not thousands of dildos of varying sizes, shapes, materials, and prices. This might seem like an overload of information, and some dildos are downright intimidating in name and design. Still, this guide aims to make the process easier for women who have begun their search for greater sexual pleasure.
Size
In the realm of dildos, two measurements are king: length and diameter.
How to Compare Different Dildos in Width?
In general, the longer the dildo the thicker it's going to be. This is because most realistic dildos use proportionate dimensions. Measuring width is pretty straight forward. The width is the length across the widest part of the dildo. The chart below shows you a comparison between an average male penis and different dildo width.
WIDTH APPROXIMATE GIRTH
1 Inch 3 to 3.5 Inches
1.25 Inches 3.75 to 4 Inches
1.5 Inches 4.5 to 4.75 Inches (Average erect penis size)
1.75 Inches 5 to 5.5 Inches
2 Inches 5.5 to 6.75 Inches
2.5 Inches 7 to 7.75 Inches
3 Inches 8 to 8.5 Inches
How to Measure Yourself for Dildos?
To measure you will need a vibrator or dildo, or an alternative item that is long and has a smooth surface; it should also be rounded on the end. If using these, clean them before use. You also need a soft tape measure.
Being aroused can enable the vagina to accommodate more, so lie on your back on the bed and stimulate yourself, or allow your partner to excite you. Once aroused, start sliding the alternative object into your vagina.
Once at the furthest point, mark where you are on the alternative object. Remove the object and measure how far from the tip to the fingers. This is the length you can cope with.
To measure girth, ask your partner to slide fingers into the vagina until you reach the limit you can enjoy comfortably. When you feel you have reached this point, wrap the tape measure around their finger/s to find the circumference/girth your vagina can accommodate.
Shape
The next vital attribute to cover is shape. The most basic dildo possible is a cylinder of a uniform diameter of a certain length, working up to beaded options or options that look near-perfect replicas of an actual male penis. What you choose is entirely up to you and your personal preferences. Suppose you would prefer an experience closest to real sex. In that case, a realistic dildo will suit you perfectly as these try to replicate the shape and feel of a real penis to the best of their ability. Other more creative dildos are designed to stimulate the G-spot specifically or to create a range of sensations that simply cannot be delivered by a man's penis. Remember that if you're buying a dildo first and foremost for yourself, there is no reason to choose something less.
In my opinion, the only extra feature that would concern newcomers is the lack or inclusion of a suction cup. A suction cup allows you to attach the dildo to a wall for hands-free stimulation of your vagina. Using your toy in as many different ways as possible (shower, floors, etc.) may make your toy more versatile & well-used.
Materials
There are two main concerns about dildo material, feel & sanitation. The feel concerns how much give a dildo has, IE, if it is squishy or firm. Sanitation concerns how clean you can get your dildo after each usage. Some materials are hotbeds for bacteria and are only good as short-term sex toys.
What makes a dildo easier to keep sanitized over others is whether or not the material is porous. Porous materials allow dirt, bacteria, and other undesirable substances to make a permanent home inside your dildo and are typically softer. These materials include rubber, jelly, PVC, and most flesh substitutes. Porous materials cannot be boiled or cleaned with harsh chemicals without risking the breakdown of the material and further contamination. Porous materials are typically cheaper, but you get what you pay for. Porous toys should under no circumstances be shared between partners. They can even re-infect the user with a past yeast or bacterial infection. It is for this reason that I suggest silicone above all else. Silicone is non-porous and comes in various densities of varying hardness, so every preference can be satisfied. Silicone can also be completely sanitized by boiling or a bleach solution (make sure to wash thoroughly after using a bleach solution!).
Different Types of Dildos
For the most part, dildos are the same except for their shape. However, it's worth mentioning that there are different types of dildos, such as squirting dildos, thrusting dildos, realistic dildos, and many, many more.
How Much Do They Cost?
I would not recommend spending over sixty dollars on your first dildo. Your first dildo should satisfy a few specifics you know you'd like, but it should also be pretty run-of-the-mill. This allows you to use your first dildo as a springboard to move forward in the world of self-stimulation. You are also not out a large sum of money if you decide that that dildo isn't right for you. I also would not recommend spending less than twenty dollars on a dildo. Overly cheap dildos are more than likely made with materials that are not body-safe and could end up causing severe harm to your reproductive organs. Even if a dildo is advertised to be 100% medical grade silicone, if it is incredibly cheap, that is a red flag.
My Recommendations
Here is a list of dildos I find work best for those new to the scene, they're all made of silicone:
The King Cock 7 In Cock Tan
It has 7'' of insertable length and a diameter of 1.25''. It's a perfect starting dildo because it's in the ideal middle-of-the-road range for size and has a desirable silicone firmness. The shaft is slightly textured for a less vanilla experience and angled just right to reach that G-spot.
Temptasia Jezebel Crimson Red Dildo
The Jezebel proves the old saying that good things are small packages. Wait, that's not it? The silicone dildo is 5.25'' long x roughly 1.5" in diameter. It's on the smaller side, but it still has some girth to give you that fulfilling pleasure you need. It's rigid and has a veiny texture for added fun.
The Fun Factory Bouncer
Is one of the more extensive options in this list, coming in at 6'' long and 1.5'' in diameter. Those lumps in the picture are three weighted balls that shift around as you thrust inside, an experience I have yet to find in another dildo. It's a very pleasurable choice for a first dildo, with the perfect size and feels.
The Bouncer dildo is one of the more expensive options on this list at $104.99 and can be found here.
Curve Midnight Purple
The dildo is 6" long by 1.37'' wide and is better than a real-life dong! There's an included suction cup, and it's relatively bendy but not floppy. It's about as close to what most women say they prefer in penis size as it gets in this market.
Tantus Acute Dil
The acute Dil is a smooth textured dildo in the medium size range, coming in at 5'' long and 1.25'' in diameter. Angled for your pleasure, it's yet another fantastic beginner dildo choice.
The Tantus Acute retails for $44.99 and can be found here
If you're on a budget and don't want to fork over the cash to buy a dildo, I've written a guide that explains how to make a dildo out of everyday household items. You can also use the Clone-A-Willy to clone your partner's penis.